The Fourth of July is supposed to be fun; not scary. Rarely did it fall into the fun category for me.
Riding the nine short blocks home from my parent’s house on the Fourth of July sounded to me like we were in a war zone with people throwing grenades at our car. Houses close together on both sides of a narrow street with people of all ages and sizes scurrying about. No one watching who was throwing and who was bent over lighting a firework.
Every summer, listening to firecrackers going off at all hours of the day and night for days makes me a bit edgy for several reasons. By the time Independence Day rolls around I’m almost a basket-case.
I don’t think I’m alone, but don’t have statistics to back me up. Besides some visually impaired folks, my guess is there are Seniors, children, those with PTSD or other mental health issues, and many doggies who might fear noisy fireworks.
Taught how to use a punk by my dad as a child, we were required to use them when setting off firecrackers. Being thorough to ensure our safety, He taught us where to set them off, how to stand, where to run, and watched us to ensure our safety.
I didn’t enjoy the loud booms much then, and that was before beginning to lose my sight from Retinitis Pigmentosa.
Of course, deciding to forego his safety rules and throw a short-fused firecracker that exploded in my hand might have had something to do with my dislike of firecrackers first.
My hand throbbed and ached for days.
With more vision loss every summer, the memory resurfaced of how many of my friends freely through fireworks unsupervised, causing fear to be my reaction to the sounds in my environment.
I automatically preferred the FREE night work shows put on by cities. The bright colors and exploding lights cascading into thin air provided contrast against the dark sky allowing my damaged eyes to view.
Over time, the fireworks faded to white, but I enjoyed watching the designs and sprays of bursting light, until shapes disappeared altogether.
Deep down I also believe I enjoyed knowing it was a controlled setting. Much safer.
Retreating to the great indoors, I did my best to ignore the noisy war sounds as often as possible. If only a few, or at a distance, they were annoying, but tolerable.
My fear and discomfort swelled every year as more people set them off at the same time. How many lacked commonsense? How many were taught the way my dad taught me.
Safety had become a foreign concept among most families and individuals. My house or another possession could catch on fire. A spark or firework could hit me.
Thankfully, I had an understanding family who helped ease my discomfort and fear.
Some years I utilize each coping skill in one evening. Other years, I use a couple and change from year to year or place to place.
Are you curious yet? Are you ready for this life-changing list (attempted humor)?
Here are the coping skills I created for me to brave celebrating in an uncomfortable world of overbearing noises coming from unexpected places.
I pray a lot as I FOCUS on these things:
1. The reactions and pleasures of my kids and grandkids . . .
A lot of my life as a now blind person involves occupying my attention to people’s reactions, as well as receiving pleasure from what they enjoy.
2. People I know well are gracious enough to announce, or share, the name of what they’re setting off, so I know what to expect, decreasing my anxiety . . .
You would be amazed at what a big difference this one small act of consideration makes to me.
3. I concentrate on calming the dogs by stroking them and talking to them.
Helping others provides a distraction so who cares if it is a canine. Comforting a scared child has the same effect.
4. I try to think about what the noise reminds me of . . . like another machine or a car backfiring.
Doing this forces your brain to make sense of a terrifying sound so it won’t build fear but diminish it.
5. Count how many pops one firework makes, or how many seconds it lasts.
Another great idea on something else to concentrate on. Refocusing is an excellent tool for almost any problem. Don’t just count – compare one kind of firework to another as your own little game if you want things to be more interesting.
6. Turn the noise into a song or fun beat.
This can be entertaining, rather than work, plus it distracts the dogs. A 2-for-1!
7. If all else fails, turn the TV or radio up REAL LOUD!
While not the best coping skill, turning volume up on something else moves the scary noise from the forefront of your brain to background noise, managing fear and anxiety levels.
No matter what fears or discomfort we face in life, there are always some things you can focus on to cope, and even overcome. Be encouraged by listening to “Fear is a Liar” by Zach Williams.
However, you celebrate our marvelous independence and freedom, don’t let fear capture your appreciation.
© 2024, Jena Fellers. All rights reserved.
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