Wedding bells rang Saturday as my baby girl became Leslie Cantrell. Her engagement was a short one like her parents and grandparents. These plans had to be made on a limited budget, with the added hardship of my blindness, and while finding them a new house. This excluded my dad being put on hospice and his passing in the midst. That’s why I thought I’d go behind the scenes and share how we accomplished this feat.
Step 1: The planning stage.
Rather than researching wedding lists, I utilized my memory from past weddings and began typing a master list on my computer. Thinking of the major categories such as the wedding party, decorations, attire, reception, then broke each one down into smaller tasks forming a checklist. I made sure I only made one list or I wouldn’t remember where to find them. That causes added confusion for a blind person – less is better.
Step 2: Evaluation and Decision-Making.
Going over the master list with my daughter to see what her ideas were about color scheme, size of wedding party and guests desired, and what kind of food for the reception enabled me to analyze costs. I then put the final list in order of importance according to time.
Step 3: Finding help.
Hunting for things when you don’t drive or know where things are definitely slows down the process. Therefore, While typing my master list I begin thinking of people I know with those giftings who might assist. Several are needed in case time schedules don’t line up. Okay, it also takes a lot of help when you’re short on time.
Gifted family members and friends utilized their talents. With google at their fingertips, comparison shopping began before gas money was spent. Prices and descriptions were given to me. If a trip needed to be made, it was scheduled by knowing the hours already. If not, a phone call or text was sent from the stores for me to give a green or red light. Thanks to networking, many items were borrowed or given that would not have been possible otherwise.
Step 4: Shopping for the wedding gown.
I sure appreciated a great friend taking my daughter and I to bridal shops to experience this special bonding time. Leslie desired to look like a princess with lots of bling. Listening to them look through racks and racks, keying in on their reactions. Asking questions and hearing descriptions created ideas of styles in my mind. Hearing gasps
from the dressing room, comments coming out, and seeing how long she looked in the mirror, all added detail. It’s kind of like looking at a car seeing its overall beauty first before opening the door to check out the detailed features. Once the overall appearance was in my mind, I felt the dress…shape and material.
Step 5: Playing the role of a wedding consultant.
From here forward, my job involved reminding people where to go, what to look for, and making calls and decisions, until the job was done. I felt many a decoration as they were being put together. I went shopping several times with different people. Some new lists were made for shopping and food, but not many. Changes were made along the way as incidents came up preventing part of the wedding party to attend. I had to read my daughter’s mind much of the time as it became too overwhelming for her. The hardest job came at the end remembering where all items purchased were and whom to give them to. No perfect answer; just a lot of double and triple-checking.
I am so grateful for God’s leading of friends to inexpensive flowers, 50% off sales, other sales and discounts, and those offering services FREE. Competent and talented people each took care of their job like a well-oiled machine… We didn’t regret not mailing out invitations, but just printing a few for church members and posting on Facebook.
Nontraditional. A special memory was made by having my husband, Steve, not only walk her down the aisle, but also perform the ceremony.
Just a FYI – I didn’t “see” the cake by feel. And, I won’t tell you whether or not I cried at not seeing my daughter walk down the aisle.
© 2015, Jena Fellers. All rights reserved.
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