A Forgotten Dream Brought Back to Life

Without hope, people are most miserable. Dreams give everyone hope. Although fear and guilt squelch more dreams than not,  it was plain ‘ole life which postponed my dream of writing indefinitely.

Involved in numerous high school and church activities, I continued in positions of leadership after learning I had an unexplainable eye condition. A “larger than normal” blind spot meant tripping over shadows and running into unseen objects would become my new normal. Amazed by my attitude and perseverance, relatives encouraged me to write a book. My keeping a diary would be an asset.

A seed was planted, and over time, I actually began to entertain the idea of becoming an author. Ideas for books popped in my mind while studying for college exams.

Adapting to the Diagnosis

A diagnosis of Retinitis Pigmentosa, a progressive, incurable eye disease quickly put my dream on hold possibly forever. Focusing on education and career was more important. After graduating, adjusting to a new town, job, and house with my tunnel vision closing in would be time-consuming, and it was.

After teaching special education a few years, increased vision loss forced me into disability and more adjustments. With my dream almost forgotten, a discovery rekindled my dream of writing. A word processing program for the blind and visually impaired, called LP Doss, allowed me to write short stories. The enlarged white letters on a non-straining blue background and black stickers with large capital letters covering my keys on my keyboard made writing a breeze.

Before finishing two stories, I met my knight in shining armor.

My dream was put on hold once again as I prepared a wedding and adjusted to an instant family as his two teenagers lived with him. A pretty good trade, in my opinion.

Once I adjusted to life, technology began to fail me. Windows was born. Yep, my writing went out the window when Windows came.

What’s a mouse? What’s an icon? 

My eyes couldn’t follow a moving arrow, nor make out images.

To keep my writing dream alive, I tried using another magnification system (CCTV).

A camera enlarged items placed on a tray beneath the computer monitor. Focusing on the computer screen in front of my face while my hand danced across the paper underneath was a bit tricky. In time, writing without looking at your hand became second nature.

Able to read, I enrolled in a writer’s course reviving my dream. Halfway through, pregnancy interrupted and eye strain made reading assignments unbearable. My dream had to be shelved again.

Resigned, I busied myself with responsibilities of the home and home educating my youngest for thirteen years. All the while, we followed technology, in case reading or writing would ever be possible again.

Resurrecting my Writing Dream

Hope repeatedly rose and fell each time technology advanced. The product either fell short of their advertising or wasn’t affordable to someone on disability. Then, when reading with my CCTV equated more guess and memory than sight, my husband found text-to-speech software for a computer.

Still hesitant and fearful, we purchased this affordable program. Fifteen years had passed since I had used a computer. Email was a foreign concept. Could I even remember how to type? Would I be able to learn?

To my delight, Serotek’s screen reader opened new doors with special keyboard commands replacing the mouse, allowing me to browse the web and more. This new technology made resurrecting my writing dream  possible

Thanks to my husband who not only found Christian Writer’s Fellowship for me to join but taught me how to use my computer, also fixes what I mess up.

Since I’ve been learning the craft of writing, I created this blog.

Researched marketing, hired a writing coach, and have a plan in place. Many obstacles have had to be overcome, but perseverance is my middle name. At least I’m able to move forward with my E-books, regardless of how often life slows me down. No matter what, my dream will never dissipate now.

What dreams have you had to put on hold due to life?
Did this story give you hope your dream could still happen? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

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© 2018 – 2019, Jena Fellers. All rights reserved.